Ships in the Night
by pride97
Summary: The cyber attack has sent the Nathan James to Venezuela. Who or what will they find?
1. Chapter 1

**Ships in the Night**

Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Yup, own nothing but original characters

Author's Note: I came up with this idea on a whim. Please don't forget to review. And yes, I am using characters that I created in Come For You, just because I don't have the energy to create new names. I honestly don't know much about Mike and Christine. I'm not sure if they are still married, if she was ever found. For the purpose of this story, they are and she was.

* * *

 _Like ships in the night_  
 _You keep passing me by_  
 _We're just wasting time_  
 _Trying to prove who's right_

 _And if it all goes crashing into the sea_  
 _If it's just you and me_  
 _Trying to find the light_

-Ships in the Night by Mat Kearney

* * *

 **June 3, 2017**

The James was seven days into her travels to Venezuela. They would be arriving at their desired port in hours. They knew from intelligence that El Norte and their leader, Juan Rodriguez, had taken over the cities of Maracay, Valencia and Puerto Cabello as well as other smaller cities. Caracus was still standing. The President had activated the military and fortified the city. He wouldn't let El Norte take the city without a fight. The James and Michener would eventually head to Caracas, but due to the influx of supporters for El Norte and Juan around the country, his people began to suffer. He asked the United States to have the James and Michener to support his people prior to reaching Caracus.

Their first stop would be the Port of Puerto la Cruz. Kara ordered a drone to be sent over the port to get thermal imaging shots. When they were closer in, she stated she would send another drone to get a live feed. From the pictures, they were able to ascertain that a large settlement of people were approximately a mile from port. Close enough to get necessary supplies, but far enough away in attempt to remain safe.

It had been different for Tom and Mike stepping onto the James this time around. While they outranked Kara, as they were both admirals, this was the first time they had been back on the James and they weren't in charge. At times it was unsettling. Tom knew that there would be situations during the upcoming situation that he and Mike may have to overrule Kara, but right now he felt he needed to walk that fine balance.

The decision to join the James on the mission to Venezuela, had been a difficult one for Tom. He hated leaving Ashley and Sam again, as he could no longer leave them with his father. Ashley and Sam took their fathers leaving as well as could be expected. They were angry, but eventually realized that Tom needed to do this to keep them safe. Thankfully, Christine, Mike's wife, stepped up and offered to watch the kids for him. She understood what he and Mike needed to do to keep the country safe from the current threat and she wanted to help in anyway that she could.

The road to reconciliation wasn't easy. It has taken Christine months to deal with her grief over Lucas dying. She blamed Mike for his death. Once she came to terms with his death and Mike not being there, they were able to really begin communicating. Essentially, Mike began courting her all over again. Their daughters, Hillary and Bridget, also had anger to deal with. They too were angry over their father not being around. Mike had to start from scratch at being a father with the girls as well, but in the end the family persevered and they were stronger for it. When Mike was offered the promotion to admiral and essentially a "desk job" he immediately accepted. He needed to stop "flying around the world" and be home with his family. Hillary would be leaving for college and Bridget was a sophomore. He didn't want to miss anymore time with them.

When the cyber attack hit the United States, Mike had no intention of leaving. It was Christine and the girls who encouraged him to "get his feet wet" and go out there. They wanted to know that their husband and father was out there fighting for them and keeping them safe. With their blessing, he joined Tom on the James.

Tom was brought out of his musing with a knock at the door. Kara had offered her captain's quarters to Tom, while Mike took the Admiral quarters. Kara said she would use her at-sea cabin for the duration of the mission.

"Come" Tom said loudly

The door opened and Mike poked his head in, "The images from the drone will be coming in momentarily."

Tom nodded and followed Mike out of the room and down to CIC. The two men chatted about what they thought the images may show.

They arrived to CIC to find Kara and Granderson, her XO, at the table looking over the images, that had been printed. The two women nodded at Mike and Tom. Kara gestured at the prints, indicating for them to go ahead and look at them.

"It looks like some sort of refugee camp." Kara said.

"You can make out makeshift buildings" Alicia stated "this" she said pointing to a picture, "looks like a hospital of some kind."

"Do we have any extra medical supplies that we can give to the doctors?" Mike asked.

"I've spoken to Doc Rios and asked him to take an inventory and see what he can spare." Kara responded.

"What is the plan commander?" Tom asked Kara.

She smiled hesitantly at him, this was the first mission the James had gone on with her as it's captain. "I want to send a two team with supplies to them. One team will deliver the supplies and be of assistance to the doctors. The second team will do some recon, speak to the refugees, find out as much as they can about El Norte."

"Admiral" Kara said addressing Tom, "If you would be agreeable, I'd like for you to lead the team that will be of assistance to the doctors. The crew members I'm sending are all medics and this will be one of their first...missions. They need a leader."

Tom nodded his acquiescence.

"Admiral" Kara said turning and addressing MIke, "If you are also agreeable, I'd like you and Danny to lead the recon team."

Mike nodded his acquiescence.

"When will we be at the port?" Tom asked.

"We should reach Puerto la Cruz in approximately an hour." Alicia answered.

"Understood, we'll be ready to leave within the hour."

* * *

The doctors at the refugee camp in Puerto la Cruz were overworked and exhausted. They were part of Doctors Without Borders. They had been sent to Venezuela only two weeks ago. News had come out that a terrorist group by the name of El Norte was wreaking havoc across the country. People were fleeing their homes for safety. Many went to Caracas, others to port cities in attempt to flee the country via ship.

Kevin Richardson stood back and watched as she fluttered around the tent. She went from patient to patient, working effectively. He marveled at her resilience. She was brilliant at what she did, and as a recent graduate from medical school, he was thrilled to work with a doctor of her caliber.

"Doctor Richardson, are you going to stand there and stare or are you going to get back to work?" she asked him, not even turning to look at him.

"Of course." Kevin went to the nearest patient and began examining them. One of the nurses helped to translate the patient's chief complaints. He ordered a blood draw and an antibiotic. He moved onto the next patient when he felt a whiff of the outside heat and humidity enter the room. He turned to see a group of United States Navy standing behind him.

"United States Navy, how can we be of assistance?"

"For one you can close the bloody door behind you." Kevin heard her shout from the end of the room.

"I apologize" the man stated and indicated for one of his men to close the door.

The man who spoke began walking towards her, "We've brought medical supplies." he stated.

Kevin watched as she stopped what she was doing and stood. Her back going rigid. She turned slowly to face the man who was speaking to her.

"Tom" she said so quietly that Kevin barely heard her.

Kevin watched as the man she called Tom, took a step back, shock on his face, "Rachel"

* * *

 **Author's Note**

So this brain child came to me for a couple of reasons. The first being that I found an article written by TV guide right after the season 3 premiere (I posted part of what the author said in another story). Essentially the author was livid that Rachel's death was so callously ignored. That we go no closure, no funeral, not even a body. Nothing. This person felt that this was done on purpose and that maybe Rachel is still alive. Then fact that TNT has done very little promotion for season 5. I got to thinking, what if they are doing very little promotion on purpose because they don't want to give away details from season 5. What if they are trying to redeem themselves to those fans who were/are still livid over Rachel. I know that the producers and even Rhona herself stated "she's dead". But the producers were more like "we wanted to see them deal with all this without Rachel." Rhona herself stated on her twitter account (and I'm paraphrasing here) that Rachel is dead and only she can decide whether or not to come back. It is a very open ended and curious statement and can be interpreted different ways.

Plus, let's think about it. If Rachel was in some sort of protective custody and is let out after Tom takes off, she may just give up as well. I know that isn't like her, but people change after tragic circumstances. What if she tried looking for Tom but just gave up and took off just like he did? She could easily go to another country and people would probably have no idea who the hell she was. Communication was knocked out due to the virus and the James was only in the United States. Michener only gave his speech about Rachel to the citizens of the United States. Yes, the leaders of other countries would probably know of her but the layperson probably wouldn't.

But I'm a hopeless optimist even when I know the reality of something happening is .001%.


	2. Chapter 2

Nothing Makes Sense Anymore Chapter 2

Disclaimer: yup still own nothing but original characters

Author's Notes: First, this is a really long chapter (fair warning). Second, I was (heck still am) incredibly nervous to finally publish it. It is completely different than what others have written in regards to Rachel/Tom. I wanted to try to get away from the standard "let's talk" that I've done in my other stories. Constructive criticism only please!

More author's notes at bottom

Thank you to tmtcltb (you are probably right about Kara not leaving for missions), srp2017, Scousedancer, bamagirlforever, and Jennparis for reviewing chapter 1. Thank you to all those who favorited/are following.

* * *

 _I turn the lights down low_  
 _Walk these halls alone_  
 _We can feel so far from so close_

 _Like ships in the night_  
 _You keep passing me by_  
 _We're just wasting time_  
 _Trying to prove who's right_  
 _And if it all goes crashing into the sea_  
 _If it's just you and me trying to find the light_  
 _Like ships in the night_  
 _You're passing me by, you're passing me by_  
 _Like ships in the night_

-Ships in the Night by Mat Kearney

* * *

"Rachel...what…" Tom began.

"Not here." Rachel began and turned to Kevin "Doctor Richardson, can you take over for a bit?"

"Of course, Doctor Scott."

Rachel nodded and motioned for Tom to follow her. Tom told his men to work with Doctor Richardson on where to put the supplies, and followed Rachel out of the room.

They walked in silence as Rachel lead Tom to a small tent about fifty feet away. They went inside and he saw that it was set up much like a military barracks with beds spaced evenly apart. This must be where the doctors and nurses slept.

"We were each given a foot locker for our possessions" Rachel told him. She lead him to a bed in the back of the room, far from everyone else. She went to her footlocker and put in her combination in the lock. She opened it and began rummaging through her possessions. When she stood again, she had a small book in her hand. She handed it to Tom.

He reached out and took it from her, his fingers gracing over hers.

"Read this first...then we'll talk."

"Rachel..." Tom began to argue.

"Please Tom." Rachel begged, "Just read it first."

Tom nodded. Rachel smiled at him and began walking out of the room. "This will probably be the quietest place, I'll make sure no one comes in and bothers you." she said and exited the room.

Tom sat down on her bed and opened the book and began reading.

* * *

 _ **March 10, 2015**_

 _My therapist recommended writing. I'm not one to do this, but as I need to get the strength back in my right arm I figured there wasn't a point in arguing._

 _The last couple of weeks have been utter hell!_

 _Being shot by a madman who only wanted me dead because I created the cure is one thing, it's entirely another thing to be told by the President of the United States and the FBI that I must be dead to stay alive!_

 _I have never been so angry at a decision that affected me. No matter how many times Tom made decisions that affected me, I knew he was doing it for a reason. I found and still find, no logic in this decision. I don't understand why I couldn't just have a massive security detail. Both Jeffrey and Director Wilson refused to answer and said that this was a "done deal"._

 _I was relocated to Bremerton, Washington. They picked the location for a few reasons, apparently the east coast was a no-go as people could "recognize me" easier (not sure how). They also decided that, god forbid, if anything should happen to me this would be one of the safest locations as they could reach out to the Navy to have me picked up._

 _My FBI handler Jennifer is nice enough and continues to check in on me, probably more than she should._

 _But nothing is going to change that everyone, everyone I care about, thinks I'm dead!_

 _How do I bloody deal with that!_

 _ **March 24, 2015**_

 _Jennifer came to see me today. It's been one month since my shooting. I spent most of the time talking about Tom. I didn't go into detail as I don't quite trust her yet, plus she has told me numerous times that nothing we say is confidential in the sense that she has to put it in her reports._

 _I tried to play off the first time I met him, but I know the day by heart. It was June 5, 2014. I was yelling at some crew member to be careful with the supplies when he introduced himself. The first thing I noticed was how handsome he was and how blue his eyes were. The second thing I noticed was the prominent wedding ring on his finger._

 _I knew then that he was off limits, but it didn't mean I couldn't admire how handsome he was._

 _I avoided him though. Probably more due to the fact that he had this aura of someone who valued honesty and here I was lying to him about why Quincy and I were taking over his helo bay._

 _I've given people bad news my entire medical career, but telling Tom that the virus was at phase six was probably one of the worst days in my life. Not only had I just been shot and injured, but this man, this strong and passionate man, was furious with me. I've never had someone that angry at me. I put on a face and demanded my samples. There are times I wish I could go back. Go back to the first time I met Tom and just tell him the truth in private and explain why this mission had to remain a secret._

 _ **April 10, 2015**_

 _I met a woman while waiting in line at the supermarket today. She is twenty weeks pregnant and was telling me that she has an appointment for her ultrasound to learn the sex next week._

 _I immediately thought of Kara and Danny. Kara would be around the same in her pregnancy. I wonder if she and Danny are going to find out the sex. I wonder how she is doing._

 _ **April 17, 2015**_

 _Jennifer came again today. We talked about Tom, again. It's almost become cathartic talking to her about him. Coming to grips with the situation I'm in. Coming to terms with not being able to see him, to talk to him._

 _Coming to terms with my feelings for him._

 _I should have told him._

 _But how do you tell a man who just lost his wife in December that you are in love with him, that you have been in love with him for longer than you care to admit?_

 _ **April 24, 2015**_

 _I've been "dead" for two months. There are no words to describe how I'm feeling today. I've spent all day in my bed, under the covers listening to the rain fall. There is a sense in irony that it is raining today when I've yet to cry. Maybe the weather is doing it for me._

 _ **April 29, 2015**_

 _I hate not being able to be a doctor. That is all I've known for more than half of my life. I can't use my knowledge in the ways I want too. Not only was I given an new identify, Lauren Anderson, but I was given a job as a professor. When Jennifer told me I was surprised. I figured they would want to keep me "hidden". But she told me that she knew I would go insane not being able to do something, anything. She also told me that a majority of the United States has no idea what I look like. She gave me a pair of glasses and told me "it worked for Superman." Either way, I'm now a professor. I never wanted to go into academia. I start my first session this summer. I'm not sure how I feel about it. Do I have the temperament to deal with students post the red flu?_

 _I've wanted to be a doctor since I was 9 years old. Watching my mother die from Malaria and my father refusing to do anything because "it was the will of God" was insane! After her death, my dad didn't want to deal with me so I was shipped off to boarding school. I made a decision that I would get done with school as quickly as possible. The quicker I was at university, the quicker I could be a doctor. I promoted and was accepted into Oxford when I was 16. I made school my life and graduated with my Bachelors of Science in Biology at 20. I immediately applied for medical school at the University of Cambridge. I graduated with my Bachelor of Medicine/Bachelor of Surgery when I was 25. While in my last year at Cambridge I made the decision to apply to Yale University for my PhD. The student visa took some time, so I spent a year in Mogadishu working in a trauma center. I started my PhD program when I was 26. I knew I wanted to do virology but I was also interested in public health. While my academic advisor strongly advised me not to work on two dissertations at the same time, he said there would be no issues with me working on my dissertation on one and beginning the coursework for the second. I received my first PhD in Virology from Yale when I was 30 and my second in Public Health, when I was 32. I immediately accepted a position with the CDC. I never imagined by 38 I'd be on a naval destroyer trying to find a primordial strain to a virus that was devastating the planet._

 _I also never expected as I approach my 39th birthday that everyone I care about, that the man I love, would think I'm dead._

 _ **May 7, 2015**_

 _I dream about Tom._

 _I dream about him every night._

 _I wonder if he is doing okay._

 _I wonder how he is dealing with my "death"._

 _ **May 9, 2015**_

 _I have come to look forward to Jennifer's visits. The only thing I hate though is when she has to tell me that she has been unable to receive permission to tell Tom that I'm alive. I appreciate that she argues against this secrecy as Tom understands "classified". I hate this!_

 _ **May 18, 2015**_

 _I think about the kiss Tom and I had on the Vyerni too often._

 _The plan was never to kiss him._

 _The plan was to hug him and pass the note that way. It wouldn't have been difficult to slide it into a pocket._

 _But when I saw him, I felt so incredibly relieved. I didn't think, I acted. I didn't think for one second about the fact that I was kissing a married man. I hate to admit that even after I justified it as a "means to an end" for not feeling guilty for kissing him. I willingly engaged in the kiss and prolonged it as long as I could._

 _I'm sure he felt guilty, but we never spoke about it. We both just ignored what had happened._

 _ **May 24, 2015**_

 _3 months today._

 _Jennifer called me on a secure line. She told me that I needed to get out of the house and not wallow._

 _I just can't. The 24th of every month is going to be a horrible day for me as long as I'm in protective custody and away from Tom._

 _ **May 27, 2015**_

 _I went to the local library today. While there I met a woman, around my age, with three children. She had just had her fourth. She asked if I had any children. I told her no but when she asked me if I wanted them, I was unable to answer._

 _I thought for the longest time I didn't want children. I had been dedicated to my education and then to my work. Having children wasn't a top priority in my life._

 _I didn't spend a lot of time with kids, until I met Ashley and Sam._

 _Tom's kids were, are, amazing!_

 _They spent two weeks with us on the Nathan James while Tom and the crew were helping to restore order to Baltimore. I felt it was my responsibility to make sure that they, along with their grandfather, were recovering from the virus. Eventually, I stopped trying to find reasons to spend time with them, I just did. Tom was always so busy, not that he was neglectful, but I could tell that they needed someone. I don't know why I felt that someone should be me. I would meet them for breakfast and lunch in the Wardroom. I would take Ashley and Sam down to the lab with me and answer any and all their questions. I watched movies with them, read them stories. I always wondered why Tom didn't ask me about all the time we were spending together, but he never did._

 _When we reached Norfolk, the kids ended up moving back into their house with their grandfather. While I understand the reasons behind it, a navy destroyer was no place for children, I was saddened to see them leave._

 _And Tom's father, Jed. That man! The stories he told me about Tom! I wish I could see him again, just to talk to him. He told me about the day Tom came home and announced he would be joining the Navy and not the Army like Jed had done. The argument and estrangement that had ensued between father and son. He also told me about how Darien and Tom met and how Tom proposed to her._

 _Darien. The person who I have mixed emotions over. I was absolutely heartbroken when I learned that Tom didn't reach her in time and she had succumbed to the virus. But then I was feeling almost a sense of relief that I didn't have to fight her for the man I was having feelings for. I felt like a horrible person! To be happy of someone's death so you could be with their widowed husband! Imagining myself with Tom and his children. Imaging myself married to Tom and pregnant with his child. I did all of that._

 _Maybe I am a horrible person._

 _ **June 6, 2015**_

 _I met Michael at a Starbucks in Atlanta. I was working at the CDC. I was drinking my latte and doing some work on my laptop when he asked if he could share the table with me. Instead of continuing to work, we ended up talking._

 _Neither one of us wanted to settle down. Our relationship was with no strings._

 _Looking back can I even call it a relationship. It was sex pure and simple._

 _ **June 17, 2015**_

 _I think about killing Niels often. I could have found another way but I was motivated by revenge. Pure and simple. This man had killed billions with his arrogance. What I regret is how I damaged Tom's trust in me. I lost all of it in a second. That almost broke me. The moment Tom no longer trusted me was the moment I realized how much I loved him._

 _Pathetic isn't it._

 _I will admit a part of me also did it because I couldn't stand what I had to do to get the answers I needed. The way he would flirt with me day in and day out and how I had to pretend that I was flattered and flirt back!_

 _I told Tom I didn't want to work with him but he insisted if he could talk to the man that was responsible for killing his wife, I could talk to him too. How do you so no a man after he has thrown his dead wife in your face?_

 _ **June 24, 2015**_

 _4 months today._

 _I decided to not stay in the house. I took the ferry to Seattle and walked around Pike's Place. I also went to the Space Needle. I'm sure I looked like a typical tourist._

 _ **June 30, 2015**_

 _I wonder how Kara is doing. She should be close to her due date. I may not believe in an almighty deity, but I do hope that wherever she is that she is healthy and that her baby is healthy._

 _ **July 4, 2015**_

 _My neighbors invited me over for the Fourth of July. Beatrice is 84 while Harold is 92, a very sweet couple. They married when she was 16 and he was 24. Harold was drafted at 18, right after the bombing at Pearl Harbor. He was trained as a medic and sent to Panama. He met Beatrice through her brother, Bill, when she was 14. They married in Cleveland, Ohio and lived there for thirteen years before moving to Arizona. They had two children, Vicki and Randy. After their children were grown, out of the house and had families of their own, they decided they were tired of the heat and moved up to Bremerton, Washington. While they missed their children and grandchildren, the families came up often for visits, prior to the virus._

 _When I first moved in, they "adopted" me as they knew I was alone. We have a weekly standing Sunday dinner on the books._

 _This particular Fourth of July their entire family came up as this was the first holiday after the cure. Vicki, her husband and three children and spouses along with all grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Randy his wife and their three kids, spouses and children._

 _Obviously, Beatrice and Harold have spoken about me to their children and grandchildren as they all welcomed me like they had known me for years._

 _They all spoke about how they managed to survive the virus, which had been a feat in and of itself. It was surreal listening to them talk about "Rachel Scott, the creator of the cure" and know they were talking about me._

 _ **July 13, 2015**_

 _A man hit on me at the gym._

 _He was attractive enough but even if I wasn't in love with another man, I'm in no place to start a relationship. I can't even be honest when someone asks my name._

 _That is no way to start a relationship. I know this first hand._

 _ **July 24, 2015**_

 _5 months ago today I was shot and my life change irrevocably._

 _The day started out normal enough. As normal as it could start considering I was up on charges of murder and had a security detail following me around wherever I went._

 _To say I was relieved when Jeffrey pardoned me would be an understatement. It was a mixture of relief and hopefulness for the future. Hopefulness as Tom and I were attempting to repair our damaged friendship. Hopefulness that maybe it could progress to something else._

 _Until I was told that I would be leaving the next day for Nebraska._

 _Of course I'd leave the very next day. It was fate telling me that I wasn't allowed to be happy._

 _I borrowed a beautiful black lace dress from a judge's daughter. I kept trying to talk to Tom, but we both kept being pulled away by others. It came to the point that I wasn't sure I would get to see him before I left so I wrote him a note._

 _But I did get to see him._

 _He looked handsome in his formal uniform._

 _I will always remember the way he looked at me._

 _I will always remember him telling me to find him._

 _But I will always regret walking away. I think about it constantly. What if I hadn't walked away? What if I had been brave and told him that we needed to talk? What if I had told him that I was in love with him? What would have happened?_

 _It's hard not to live in the past._

 _Instead I walked away and I was shot and my life ended, in more ways than one._

 _ **July 28, 2015**_

 _Jeffrey gave a speech today._

 _A speech about ME!_

 _A speech about how I am missed! A speech about how I'm saving the world!_

 _I couldn't watch it. I immediately turned it off, quickly changed and went to the gym. I went straight to the punching bag and let loose._

 ** _August 9, 2015_**

 _Today is my birthday. Not Lauren Anderson's birthday, but Rachel Scott's. I didn't celebrate last year given the situation, trying to save the world and all, but after the cure I thought this one would be different. I imagined spending it with Tom. I imagined spending it with...well..the crew that I began to consider family on the James._

 _Instead I'm in a strange town, alone._

 _ **August 17, 2015**_

 _Jeffrey is dead._

 _The reports are that he hung himself over grief as it has been revealed that he brought his sick son to Florida, which caused the virus to spread. His actions killed thousands._

 _I'm at a loss for words._

 _I know, knew, Jeffrey. Something seems "off" about this suicide of his._

 _ **August 24, 2015**_

 _Jennifer came today._

 _At least she was honest and told me that it was because today is the 6 month anniversary of my shooting._

 _Today is the first day that I've cried for everything I've lost. Jennifer, ever the pro, held my hand while I cried._

 _I'm wondering why I held it in for this long._

 _I'm hoping Tom is okay today. If today is hard for me, will he be okay?_

 _ **September 3, 2015**_

 _Jennifer showed up unannounced today. She has never done this._

 _I wish I could say she brought me good news._

 _She didn't._

 _She told me that the virus had mutated in China and that 5 members of the James had been taken hostage. Tom had gone to search for the missing crew. I asked if they were all okay. When she didn't answer right away, I knew the answer was no. Mason is dead. Mike, Andrea, Rios and Master Chief are all okay._

 _She assures me that Tom is okay._

 _She tells me that that isn't all. That Allison Shaw kidnapped Ashley and killed Jed. The news of Jed being dead is too much. When she informs me that Tex is also dead, the tears I was attempting to contain, began to fall in earnest._

 _When she tells me that Tom has walked away from navy. I can hardly believe it. This is a life he has known for twenty years!_

 _I beg her to speak to Director Wilson on my behalf. Beg them to let me leave and be with Tom. He's left the navy, we can go off and be somewhere together and no one would have to be the wiser. Hell, the world can continue to think I'm dead for all I care._

 _ **September 10, 2015**_

 _I've been told that I get to leave protective custody. I told Jennifer that until she finds Tom, I'm not leaving. I've already lost so much. I can't lose him too._

 _ **September 24, 2015**_

 _7 months_

 _For the first time since my shooting, I'm hopefully optimistic. Jennifer keeps telling me she is trying to find Tom. For someone who doesn't believe in an organized religion, I keep praying that she does find him._

 _ **October 1, 2015**_

 _Jennifer came to Washington today. I was surprised to see her. She told me that she had some information that couldn't be shared over the phone._

 _First she tells me that the virus mutating wasn't accurate. She admitted that she probably shouldn't be telling me, but felt I had a right to know. Allison Shaw and Peng (the Chinese President) were working together to break up the United States. They were behind tampering with the cure so that it would be ineffective. So when people in Vietnam became sick, the assumption was that I had screwed up and the virus had mutated. Allison and Peng wanted distrust to be placed on me, Tom, the navy and the United States Government as a whole. I was furious when she told me this. Enough people died due to the bloody virus, to deliberately allow more to die is just unconscionable._

 _Which leads to Tom._

 _She tells me she can't find Tom. She has reached out to every contact she has in the DoD, the Navy, the Secret Service. No one can find him. She even reached out to Mike claiming to be an "old friend of Darien's" and Mike doesn't know where he is. Tom returned to Saint Louis after the James docked in San Diego, packed up, sold the house, grabbed Sam and Ashley and left._

 _I feel lost._ _He told me to find him!_

 _How the bloody hell am I going to find him when he doesn't want to be found!_

 _I feel like I've fallen into an abyss and there is no way out._

 _ **October 9, 2015**_

 _After spending days crying and refusing to get out of bed, I've made a decision._

 _I'm leaving Washington._

 _I told Jennifer that I would leave protective custody but I had no desire to "reenter" the United States as Rachel Scott, right now. Let the United States population continue to think I'm dead for all I care._

 _I have decided that I will join Doctors Without Borders. I need to get out of the United States. Once it is announced that I'm not dead, I'll be a celebrity again. I'm sure I'll have to have a security detail again, I don't want that._

 _At least in another country the chances of anyone knowing who I am are slim to none. I can be a doctor again._

 _I can do good again._

 _Jennifer asks me if I'm sure about this. I insist I am. She said she would make calls to the company and get my medical licensure activated again._

 _ **October 11, 2015**_

 _I'm leaving for Japan in 5 days. Jennifer got me a spot in Doctors Without Borders. The CEO was thrilled when he learned that the famous "Rachel Scott" was indeed alive and wanted to join his troops. Jennifer had him sign a confidentiality agreement at my bequest. I didn't want my sudden "reappearance" into the world to become primetime fodder. I also didn't want reporters to start following me around the world, which I know they would. I've instructed Jennifer that if, more when, people come asking about me that is when she can confirm that I am in fact alive, but that is it. They have to come to her (well the FBI or the White House) seeking confirmation._

 _ **October 24, 2015**_

 _8 months ago today._

 _I hope Tom is okay, I pray that he is okay._

 _I love him._

 _I've gotten settled. I enjoy being able to use my hands again. I enjoy being a doctor again. I enjoy being called by my name "Rachel Scott" and not "Lauren Anderson". The doctors and nurses I work with have been told by corporate that I would be coming and that I wished to keep my presence quiet. While it was no longer a secret that I was alive, it wasn't being broadcast around the world. The doctors and nurses respected my wishes._

 ** _November 24, 2015_**

 _9 months ago today._

 _I hope Tom is okay, I pray that he is okay._

 _I love him._

 ** _November 26, 2015_**

 _The doctors and nurses I'm working with are all from the United States. Due to it being Thanksgiving, they wanted to celebrate. Obviously, this isn't my holiday. I did go to Thanksgiving dinners when I lived in the United States, when I was invited. It was pleasant enough._

 ** _December 7, 2015_**

 _One year ago today Tom and Tex were taken by the Russians to the Vyerni._

 _One year ago today I willingly volunteered myself to rescue them._

 _One year ago today I kissed Tom._

 _I will never forget the feel of his lips on mine._

 ** _December 15_**

 _It seems surreal that one year ago I was on the James and the trials had just finished. A year ago, I was in Tom's arms celebrating that we had not only come up with a vaccine but a cure. Relishing in the moment._

 _Our embrace. It felt more intimate than the kiss. Just two people hanging onto each other...needing physical contact with another human being. I never wanted that embrace to end._

 _Tex admitted to me months later, while we were in the shack waiting for the James to take out the sub, that he saw our embrace. While he still had to kiss me in Baltimore, he knew then that I had feelings for Tom. I tried to deny when he said this but he shushed me and said that I may not have known my feelings then. He also told me that Tom and I would talk, that we would sort out all the unresolved feelings._

 _To bad we never did. I wish we had. I was scared. He was still so mad at me. Another regret._

 ** _December 24, 2015_**

 _10 months ago today._

 _I hope Tom is okay, I pray that he is okay._

 _I love him._

 _It's Christmas Eve and all I want to do is hide from everyone. I should be with Tom. I should be celebrating Christmas with him and the kids. I shouldn't be in Japan._

* * *

Tom set Rachel's journal down and took a moment. It was then that he realized he was crying. Two plus years of emotions hitting him all at once. When he took this mission, never in his wildest dreams would he think Rachel would be alive and healthy and...beautiful. He blamed himself for her death and now he felt tremendous guilt as she had tried to find him, but he made himself and the kids disappear.

He flipped through the journal and noticed that her entries became scarce in 2016. She speaks about leaving Japan and going to the Middle East for a period time and then ending up in Australia. There was one long entry on February 24, 2016, but otherwise she did one entry a month on the anniversary or her "death". She stated how many months it had been, that she hoped he was okay and that she loved him. This pattern continued until January 2017. He flipped back to February 24, 2016 and began to read.

* * *

 ** _February 24, 2016_**

 _It's been one year._

 _12 months._

 _365 days._

 _Tom has believed for one year that I'm dead._

 _Where the bloody hell is he?_

 _I still make casual inquiries. Nothing._

 _I imagine it all again in my head, except this time I do everything differently._

 _This time I go to him and I kiss him. I tell him that I love him and that I can't leave him. I tell him that I will go back and speak to Jeffrey in the morning and ask him to send Milowski instead._

 _He then tells me that he loves me. He takes my hand and we go into his room. We kiss and undress each other. Tom making love to me through the night._

 _But then the real world hits me like a ton of bricks. To everyone I work with, I'm fine. I'm healed and I'm okay. That I'm not an emotional wreck day in and day out. I've become very, very, very good and pretending everything is okay in front of the people I work with._

* * *

Tom's heart clenches at this entry. He takes a deep breath before flipping to February 2017, when he knows her entries start to change.

* * *

 _ **February 8, 2017**_

 _The virus is now devastating the food crops. Corn, wheat, rice. People are now dying because they can't eat. I've contacted Doctors Without Borders and I'm trying to get as much information as possible. They_ _unfortunately don't know a lot as botany isn't their "field of expertise". I remind them that viruses are mine. What I would give to be able to examine a strain of the red rust? I may not be able to develop a cure but I can break down the virus._

 ** _February 15 2017_**

 _Jennifer showed up today out of nowhere. I knew immediately that it had to do with Tom. That is the only reason she would show up in a refugee camp in the middle of the Australian outback._

 _She first tells me that the Nathan James as been sent on a mission to recover seeds that are immune to the red rust. The seeds are located in Greece. She then informs me that Tom was in Greece. She thinks he was there the entire time. He was going by a fake name._

 _He is now back on the James. There is some sort of issue (she is unable to divulge as she only barely got permission to tell me what she was telling). Rumor is that he has taken an oath and has received his commission of Captain back._

 _And no, he has no idea that I'm alive, in fact a majority of the citizens of the United States, let alone the world, still think I'm dead. The FBI did their damndest to respect my wishes._

 _She tells me she can find a way to tell him. I tell her no, that it needs to come from me, not from the FBI. Jennifer understands._

 _She promises that when she knows more about him getting back to the United States, she will let me know so I can get back and see him._

 _I've been disappointed so often that I'm afraid to get my hopes up._

 _ **February 24, 2017**_

 _2 years today._

 _I hope Tom is okay. I pray that he is okay. I need him to be okay. I love him._

 _ **March 1, 2017**_

 _I'm scared. I was scared when the virus was devastating the planet. Now it's_ _devastating the planet by killing the crops. It is getting harder and harder to feed the people who are coming to us in need of medical assistance. Many are now coming because they are starving. We are giving more to the patients than to ourselves, which doesn't help._

 _ **March 24, 2017**_

 _25 months today_

 _I hope Tom is okay. I pray that he is okay. I need him to be okay. I love him._

 ** _April 7, 2017_**

 _I've heard nothing from Jennifer regarding Tom and the Nathan James. It takes weeks for us to get any sort of non-pertinent medical information where we are. While communications are better than they were immediately after the red virus, they are no where what they used to be. Wi-fi is spotty to say the least. Governments need electricity and wi-fi to keep themselves up and running, along with their individual militaries. So civilians are at the bottom end of the stick when it comes to priority._

 _I guess it's probably a good thing that I didn't get my hopes up._

 _ **April 24, 2017**_

 _26 months today_

 _I hope Tom is okay. I pray that he is okay. I need him to be okay. I love him. _

_I have requested to Venezuela. There is a terrorist group by the name of El Norte destroying the country. People are fleeing to the capital and port cities. Doctors Without Borders and Nurses Without Borders have decided to send a team to the port city of Puerto la Cruz. It is an extremely small port and city, but this is where we can be of the most assistance. We can help get the people healthy from their trek across the country, away from El Norte, and get them out of the country or on to Caracas._

 ** _May 5, 2017_**

 _My request to go to Venezuela has been approved. I'll be leaving in a few days. I have to go by ship, but that is okay. I spent so much time on the James that it would be second nature. There will be two other doctors and three nurses total._

 ** _May 20, 2017_**

 _I arrived in Venezuela today. We got the camp set up rather quickly. We are about a mile from the port, which is good. Close enough to get people out by ship if need be and get supplies, but enough away for us not to be surprised if heaven forbid El Norte decides to come via the water. So far we don't think that is a possibility. They seem pretty content to go city to city capturing, killing and scaring people into submission._

 _Doctor Kevin Richardson is young. He just graduated from Harvard medical school. The other doctor, Sahkti Krishna is from India. She has been a doctor for about ten years. She was able to survive the virus as the hospital she worked at had no infected yet and they barricaded themselves. She expresses guilt for what they choose to do to survive, but I get it. It was a desperate time in the world. Even the most stringent doctor may betray the universal creed of "first do no harm." I did it myself._

 _The nurses are all from the United States. Aubrey, Kayla and Jason._

 _ **May 24, 2017**_

 _27 months since my shooting_

 _27 months since I've seen Tom_

 _As if today couldn't be any worse of a day, I've learned that the United States has become victim of a cyber attack. Fighter jets attacked a ceremony at Norfolk. My gut is telling me Tom was there. God, my mind is wondering in a thousand different directions. What if he was hurt? What if he was killed?_

 _I don't even know how I would go about finding out if he is okay. I could try to reach out to Jennifer but it could take weeks and I don't have weeks! I may have to go to Kevin, Aubrey, Kayla or Jason and ask them to find out for me._

 _I don't use the "I'm Rachel Scott, creator of the cure" for special favors, but I may have to play my trump card now. I need to know if he is okay._

 ** _May 29, 2017_**

 _I caved and used my trump card. We are only supposed to use the sat phone in "emergencies". I memorized the number to the FBI years ago in case of emergency while in protective custody. I called them and demanded to speak to the director. The person I spoke to fumbled over themselves when I told them who I was._

 _I spoke to Director Wilson, who seemed surprised to hear from me. I basically told him he owed me and that I wanted, no needed, to know if Tom was okay. I also demanded that he find Tom and tell him. To hell with me telling him. Director Wilson could deliver that blow and send Tom to me._

 _That's when he told me the horrible news. Communication across the United States was shotty at best, hell he was surprised I was able to get through as most telecommunications are down. He said he would do his very best but the odds weren't in my favor. He couldn't go into many details as it was classified, I understood. I begged him to try, that's all I could ask. He told me not to get my hopes up._

 _Yeah I'm used to that by now._

* * *

Tom closed her journal and took a deep breath. His thoughts and emotions were running amok. He didn't even know where to start when speaking to her.

He placed her journal back on her bed, stood and left the tent. Outside he saw Vulture team assisting the doctors and nurses. He was sure that Rachel gave most of the orders. In fact, he saw that is what she was doing right now. She was directing O'Connor, who seemed thrilled to be talking to her again, where to put some supplies.

He watched her for a few moments. She glanced over and saw him. Her face lit up and she gave him a smile. Without thinking, he went over to her and pulled her petite frame to his and embraced her. Rachel immediately returned the embrace. She started to sob, to which he held her tighter. He knew they would need to talk, but right now he would just relish her being back in his arms.

Right now, that was enough.

* * *

 **Author's Notes**

I hope you guy enjoyed this chapter. I tired to put myself into Rachels head while writing the journal entries. I know when I'm writing in my journal it's just random thoughts and feelings. Sometimes it makes sense and other times it doesn't. Some are short and some are long. It just depends on how I'm feeling that particular day. I also don't write in my journal daily. Mostly when I feel like I need to write. I also am one to write things in my journal that I would NEVER say in real life and I really tried to convey that with Rachel. That the journal may have started out as an assignment to get her strength up but eventually it became her therapeutic outlet. Where she could "say" what she needed to say without repercussions. I know it may seem like she is "wallowing" but no matter how strong of a person Rachel is, she is still human. She still has her breaking point. Plus, this is a journal. I'm sure she puts on a "brave" face in person.

I had to play around a bit with Rachel's past. I did find online that the character did have all the degree's I listed. She also stated that she spent a year in Mogadishu as a trauma doctor and she obviously worked for the CDC and WHO, but her character (going strictly of Rhona's age) would have only been 38 in 2014! So I needed to make Rachel a little overachiever (which totally fits her character anyways). I also used Rhona's birthday for Rachel's birthday.

 **A little side note:** the couple Beatrice and Harold, those are my grandparents. Everything I put about the couple in the story is my grandparents life (including the names of their children). The only difference is my grandparents never moved to WA, that is just my addition to them in the story. They have since passed but this is a little homage to the most amazing grandparents a person could ever have!


	3. Chapter 3

Ships in the Night chapter 3

Disclaimer: yup own nothing

Rating: M (adult content kiddies)

Author's Notes: Thanks everyone for reading and reviewing. Much like Rachel's journal, this was a very hard and emotional chapter to write.

I don't remember the name of the couple that Tom was staying with in season 4, so just go with the names I've assigned them.

The ending is a little fluffy, but dude Tom and Rachel deserve some fluffy!

Also, making an assumption that while the cyber attack took out a lot of technology with the United States that the ships weren't affected (otherwise not sure how the ships would even be working). Therefore any technology on the ships was unaffected.

* * *

 _I'm gonna find my way_

 _Back to your side_

 _I'm gonna find my way_

 _Back to your side_

 _Like ships in the night_

 _You keep passing me by_

 _Just wasting time_

 _Trying to prove who's right_

 _And if it all goes crashing into the sea_

 _If it's just you and me_

 _Trying to find the light_

 _Like ships in the night_

 _You're passing me by_

 _You're passing me by_

 _Like ships in the night_

-Ships in the Night by Mat Kearney

* * *

"Vulture team, we've got a problem." Mike called out.

Tom and Rachel pulled apart so he could answer Mike, "What's wrong?"

"During our recon we met some incoming refugees who've indicated that a group of militants about fifty of them, not El Norte but followers, are heading towards the town."

"How long do we have?" Tom asked worried, looking at the hustle that was happening around him. He saw Rachel's eyes go big at what Mike had just stated.

"I'm guessing no more than thirty minutes, we are on our way back to your location."

Tom turned to O'Connor and gave him a looked that indicated for him to get the remainder of the team. He ushered Rachel and the team over to the side. He felt bad, other than O'Connor the rest of the team were trained as medics. They had very little combat experience.

"Cobra team just reported in. We have a group of approximately fifty militants heading our way." Tom turned to Rachel, "Rachel, how many people are here right now?"

She thought for a moment, "there's about a hundred people here. Some are critical."

"Can they be moved?"

"I wouldn't recommend it."

"They either get moved or they die Rachel." Tom told her.

Before Tom could start giving orders to the team- Mike, Danny, Wolf, Burk and two other men came running to them.

Rachel turned to see the men, who abruptly stopped when they recognized her. A chorus of "holy shit" rang from their mouths.

"Later" Tom ordered "Rachel, get to work with the other doctors and nurses on moving the critical patients."

Rachel nodded and indicated for the medics to follow her.

"We've got ten minutes to get out of here as it will take time for these people to walk the mile to the port. We get them on the James and get the hell out. We'll figure out where to take them later. We can't leave them here to die."

The men nodded and scattered. Mike went over to Tom.

"Okay, just clarifying that I'm not seeing things…"

"You aren't. Rachel isn't dead. She or I will explain later."

"Got it." Mike said and went to work.

* * *

Ten minutes later the ensemble began walking towards the port. Tom told Kara what was going on. She immediately called for general quarters and for all hands be at their battle stations. She ordered for the ship to be ready to pull out the moment everyone was aboard. She also ordered a group of enlisted down to helo bay to assist Doc Rios with the influx of refugees.

They heard random gunshots in the distance and knew that the militia was close behind. Tom and crew urged the refugees on. All hell broke loose when they were approximately a hundred yards from the ship. People began to scream and run. Tom turned to see vehicles coming.

"Get everyone to the ship!" Tom yelled "Cobra team set up a perimeter. Nathan James this is vulture team, hostiles inbound!"

Tom grabbed Rachel's arm, to which she looked at him confused.

"Green" he called over to Danny, who came running over, "Get Rachel on the ship. Stay with her until I get on. Understand."

"Yes, sir."

"Tom, I don't need a babysitter…" Rachel began to argue.

"Don't care Rachel. Take her."

Danny put his hand on her back, "come on Doctor Scott, let's get on the James".

Within minutes the refugees were all on the James in the helo bay. Doc. Rios and his group of medics were shocked to see Rachel, but recovered quickly and began to assist the other doctors and nurses in caring for the patients. They heard the gunfire and the shouting going on outside the ship.

Rachel tried to keep her focus, rushing from patient to patient, with Danny keeping a close eye on her. She kept glancing up, looking for Tom to enter the bay. He could see the fear in her eyes.

Danny felt for her. He knew the Admiral and Doctor Scott had been extremely close prior to her...death. He personally felt that they had fallen in love with one another, but both were too scared to say or do anything about it. More so the Admiral as he had just lost his wife and probably felt he needed to uphold some sort of "moral compass" for the crew. When he saw the Admiral enter the helo bay, he quickly approached Doctor Scott.

"Doctor Scott" he said "The admiral is back."

Rachel gave him a confused look, he immediately realized his error as Rachel wouldn't know of Tom's promotion, "Captain Chandler, ma'am". He pointed to where Tom was standing.

Rachel turned. Ignoring decorum she ran over to him and threw her arms around him.

"God dammit Tom" Rachel whispered angrily "as much as you don't want me to get hurt…"

Tom put his arms around her, "I'm sorry. I just couldn't lose you again."

Rachel didn't respond, she just held onto Tom tighter, ignoring everything that was going on around her.

Tom pulled away, "are you okay?"

She nodded, "I'm so sorry Tom. I…"

"I know" Tom replied, pulling her to him again.

They were interrupted with Doctor Richardson coming over and needing Rachel to check over a patient. She smiled sadly at Tom who told her to "go to work."

He watched as she flitted around the helo bay, assisting the other doctors and nurses and Doc. Rios as well. He saw Kara enter the helo bay, a look of relief on her face that they were all okay. She rushed over to Tom.

"Is it true?"

Tom nodded and pointed to Rachel.

"Holy shit" Kara said and then realized her blunder "sorry sir"

"It's okay. That seems to be the general reaction. I'm surprised it reached the bridge that quickly."

"It hasn't, at least not yet, give it an hour. Danny let me know as soon as he got on."

Tom nodded in understanding.

"Is she okay?"

"If you are talking about in this current situation, yes. If you are speaking of everything that has happened in the last two years to her...I'm not sure. She seems fine…"

"But appearances can be deceiving." Kara finished.

"Exactly."

"Kara!" Rachel shouted. She rushed over and embraced the young woman. Kara returned the hug.

"How are you?" Rachel asked.

Kara laughed, "I'm good. I should be asking you...considering."

"I know...it's complicated and I promise we'll sit down and I'll tell you everything." Rachel said, "but tell me about the baby. What did you have? Boy? Girl? Their name?"

"I had a boy. We named him Frankie. He's going to be two in July. He's with my mom right now."

"Congratulations!"

"He's pretty amazing."

An ensign approached Kara, "Captain, Admiral you're needed in CIC."

"I'll be right there" Kara replied. She embraced Rachel again "I'll find you later and we will have that talk. Admiral." Kara said to Tom and she left.

Tom took Rachel's hand, "Come on" he said and began pulling her from the helo bay.

"Tom, where?"

He shushed her and began leading her down p-ways to his quarters. He opened the door and allowed her to enter first. He pulled her over to his computer and opened up a file that was labeled "Rachel".

"Press play." He said leaning down and gave her a soft kiss on the lips.

"Okay." Rachel waited until the door closed securely behind Tom before pressing play. His voice filling the room.

* * *

 _June fifth two thousand fourteen. I met Doctor Rachel Scott today. Our conversation was...short...almost abrasive. She apologized for taking over the helo bay. When questioned why we were heading to the arctic she claimed they would be studying birds. Seems a little odd for the Navy to agree to send a team of two doctors to the Arctic to study birds. Either way that is above my pay grade._

 _October fifth two thousand fourteen. I'm not even sure where to begin. Rachel has been lying to us for the last four months! There is a virus destroying the world. It is now at phase six, according to Rachel which means global pandemic. Eighty percent of the world is infected. She only admitted this to me after the Russians attacked us. I found her in the helo bay, wounded. I will admit that my heart clenched. I may not have spent much time speaking to her during the last four months, but she is on my ship and I don't want her injured. She is my responsibility. I threatened to throw her samples overboard. I demanded answers. I never expected the answers I got. I'm terrified. I'm terrified for my family. Will I get to see Darien, Ashley, Sam and my father again? Will I get to see my brother and sister? I understand she had orders, orders that came straight from the White House, but it doesn't make it any easier._

 _December fifteenth two thousand fourteen. The trials were successful. Not only was Rachel able to come up with a vaccine, she was able to create the cure. I'm not sure what possessed me to embrace her, but I did. Maybe it was the need for human contact. Maybe it was in celebration. It was a...different feeling. The last woman I hugged was Darien. Rachel fit into my arms and molded to my body in a much different way than Darien ever did. I noticed Tex watching us. I'm sure he thinks something is going on, especially with the kiss that Rachel gave me on the Vyerni. I may need to remind him that I'm married and that while I do care about Rachel, I need to ensure she is safe, that is as far as my feelings for her go._

 _December twenty fourth two thousand fourteen. I imagined spending Christmas Eve much differently. I imagined spending it with my family at our home in Norfolk. Instead, I'm spending it on the Nathan James. I'm trying to help my children deal with the loss of their mother. I'm trying to deal with the loss of my wife. I didn't make it to her in time. I barely made it in time to save my children and father. I couldn't even focus on the loss of Darien as I then learned that Rachel was being held hostage by Granderson and that the James had been taken over by her crew of military personnel. I had to leave my children and father with Jeter so I could get my ship back. To get Rachel back. Telling the resistance that Rachel was a priority, that she had to survive was surreal. I was more worried about her than my own dead wife. We've been back on the ship for two days now. I gave my father and kids my cabin. I will sleep in my at sea one. Rachel has made it her mission to care for my family. I think she feels guilty that I wasn't able to save Darien._

 _January third two thousand fifteen. The last two weeks have been trying both mentally and emotionally. The crew has persevered in restoring peace and order to Baltimore. We have been working in conjunction with the resistance. Rachel has been amazing. I haven't spoken to her about it, but I know that she has spent everyday with Ashley, Sam and my dad. She meets them for breakfast and lunch in the Wardroom. Dad says that she even has taken the kids down to the lab. They come back excited, telling him everything that Rachel showed them, let them do and taught them. I feel like I've been neglecting them. I should talk to her. I should tell her how grateful I am that she has bonded with them. That they have bonded with her. It's hard though. I have caught her reading to them. I imagine Darien doing that. I then leave and head to my cabin. It took some time but I finally cried. I miss my wife everyday. I have to be strong in front of my crew, in front of my children and father and even in front of Rachel. We will be leaving for Norfolk soon. I'm scared. I'm scared to enter my home. I'm scared to see everything of Darien's. To acknowledge that she is dead. I'm not ready to do that._

 _January fourth two thousand fifteen. I had every intention of resigning my commission. To walking away and staying with my family in Norfolk. Until they all talked me out of it. They told me my mission wasn't over. I still needed to work with Rachel at mass production of the cure. As much as I wanted to stay at home with my kids, it doesn't feel like home because Darien is gone. Maybe being on the ship, away from everything will help. I know it takes time._

 _February seventh two thousand fifteen. I think I broke Rachel today. I told her if I could talk to the man who killed my wife and billions of others that she could work with him to find a way to make the cure more effective. Her face. It was a mixture of anger...and hurt. I've seen Rachel angry. I've seen Rachel so angry that she is crying. I've seen Rachel so exhausted she is crying. I've never seen Rachel..hurt..in the way that I just hurt her. I don't know how to fix it._

 _February seventh two thousand fifteen. Niels Sorensen is dead. I can't say that I'm saddened by this news. No, what concerns me is that during Mike's investigation conflicting evidence has arisen. Evidence that Rachel...that Rachel may have killed him. It's hard for me to believe that she could do this. President Michener asked me what I was going to do. I have no idea. It's Rachel. Rachel. The one person on this ship I've come to trust as much as Mike. Mike said we are waiting for lab work, but I know what it's going to say._

 _February ninth two thousand fifteen. I confronted Rachel. She admitted to it. Admitted to killing Niels and said she's do it again in a heartbeat. I had to punish her. I've punished crew before. It was part of the job. But with Rachel. I….it hurt me to punish her. I limited her contact with crew. She has a security detail with her. She asked me if this is what I wanted. I told her it has never been about what I wanted. I don't even know what I want right now, but punishing Rachel...that is something I never wanted to do. I will never forget the hurt in her eyes._

 _February sixteenth two thousand fifteen. Rachel continues to save my life. She kept me alive after my shrapnel injury from the oil rig. Now, she has removed the remaining shrapnel. She told me she can still use her powers for good. When she left with Mike and Tex to go to land while I took out the sub...watching her leave. Sadness. Her eyes were filled with sadness. What's worse is I know that I'm the cause of her sadness. We should talk. We need to talk...I just don't know where to start._

 _February twenty fifth two thousand fifteen. She's gone. Rachel's dead. Murdered. Shot down by an insane immune who didn't want her creating the fucking cure! The day started out wonderfully. President Michener pardoned her. She no longer had to have a security detail on her. I wanted to find her, to talk to her, but I kept getting pulled into meetings. When I finally saw her it was at the Inauguration Ball. She looked absolutely beautiful in her borrowed black lace dress. Unfortunately, even then we didn't get a chance to speak as we both kept getting pulled way. By midnight, I was exhausted and headed up to my room. And there she was. Beautiful. Stunning. Alive. She told me that Jeffrey was sending her to Nebraska. She handed me an envelope with her itinerary. She said she would see me when she sees me. I could tell she wanted more. I wish I knew why I held back. I told her to find me when she got back. To fucking find me! I should have grabbed her and kissed her, like I've been wanting to do for far longer than I care to admit. I should have told her we needed to talk. I should have done so many things, but I didn't. I fucking didn't! And now she's gone! I heard the gunshot. My gut told me it was Rachel. I bolted from the room to find her crumpled on the floor, blood seeping from the wound. I took off my jacket and placed it to the wound. I picked her limp body up and ran down to the party like a madman. Utter chaos arose when I entered. Secret service jumped into action and took Jeffrey. The James crew began to lock down the building to find the shooter. Doc Rios and Milowski rushed me out of the way so they could work on her. She was rushed to the hospital where even Rios and Milowski were pushed aside. Jeffrey arrived shortly after. He spoke to the doctors, for what seemed like hours. As soon as he came out, I knew, Rachel was gone. I couldn't stay there. I turned and walked away. I should have asked to see her body. I should have taken her hand. But I couldn't. I went back to the hotel, crawled into bed and cried. I honestly don't know how to pick up the pieces. After Darien's death, I honestly thought I wouldn't ever fall in love again. Darien was the love of my life. But Rachel, beautiful, passionate Rachel, wormed her way into my heart. I fell in love with her when I wasn't looking to fall in love with anyone. And now she's gone._

 _March third two thousand fifteen. Rachel's memorial service was today. All the Nathan James crew was in attendance. It was a beautiful service. I'm incredibly thankful that Ashley, Sam and my dad are in Saint Louis now. They are keeping my mind occupied. Dad can tell that I'm not doing well. He tries to get me to talk... I just can't. Not yet._

 _March twenty fourth two thousand fifteen. Rachel has been dead for a month. It's been a month since I saw her beautiful face. Her smile._

 _June twenty fourth two thousand fifteen. Rachel has been dead for five months. Dad found me crying. He held me like when I was a child. He insisted that it was time to talk. I told him everything. How when Rachel and I met it was abrupt and cold. How when I found out she had been lying our relationship started out with distrust and even hostility, but eventually turned to trust and caring. How even with Darien's death I had to save Rachel, protect Rachel. Realizing I was starting to care about her more than just a friend. Realizing I was, am, so in love with her and now she's gone. My poor dad. He just sat there and listened while I blubbered on._

 _July twenty eighth two thousand fifteen. Jeffrey gave a speech about Rachel today. About how she continues to save the world with her contagious cure. It was a nice tribute but I'd much rather have her here...alive...with me._

 _August third two thousand fifteen. Jeffrey sent me to Hong Kong to meet with the Chinese President Peng. Low and behold, Sasha Cooper was there as a translator. I knew something was up immediately. I've known Sasha since academy. We met when we were both Plebes. We started dating. I thought, at the tender age of twenty one, that we were meant to be. In reality, we never would have worked. We are too much alike. Sasha ended the relationship. She was in no way ready for marriage or children. Looking back, things worked out for a reason. I met Darien three years later. We married when I was twenty-six. She gave me two amazing children. Then there's Rachel, who I was probably destined to meet. God I miss her. I miss Darien. I'm so tired of losing people. Which is probably why I'm so determined to find Mike and the missing crew of the James._

 _August ninth two thousand fifteen. Today is Rachel's thirty-ninth birthday, or what would have been her thirty-ninth birthday. I hope, no I pray, she's at peace. I wish I was._

 _August seventeenth two thousand fifteen. Jeffrey is dead. The report is that he committed suicide due to regret for bringing his son to Florida. Something isn't sitting right with me._

 _August twenty fourth two thousand fifteen. Rachel has been dead for six months. Six months since I've seen her smile. Six months since I've seen her beautiful face. I kept her picture from the file I was given. I'm afraid that I'll forget what she looks like. I'm trying to deal with this anniversary in the face of the global crisis occurring. First there's the issue in Asia of the virus and now I'm learning that there are issue in the United States._

 _September second two thousand fifteen. I'm done. I never thought I would say that, that I'm done with everything. I'm done with the navy, something that has been my life for over twenty years. Allison Shaw killed Jeffrey Michener, all in a vain attempt to destroy the United States! She tried to kill me! She killed my father! She kidnapped my children! I understand what Rachel went through when she made the decision to kill Niels. How when evil is staring you in the face, you act. I willingly took Allison's life. I didn't hesitate. She killed my father! How I wish I could tell Rachel that I get it, that I understand. Now is when I need her or Darien. Instead I've lost them both. I'm tired of losing people I love. Darien, Rachel, my father. To make matters worse, Tex...Tex is dead. Allison killed him! The last conversation I had with Tex was about Rachel. He told me that he didn't blame me anymore for her death. Too bad I blame myself. Every. Single. Day. I blame myself. It is my fault she is dead. I should have gone to her. I should have walked her back to her room. It is my fault that Darien is dead. I didn't get to her in time. It is my fault my father is dead, I didn't get to him in time. My children had to witness their grandfather being murdered! It's too much. I'm walking away and I am choosing not to look back._

 _September twenty fourth two thousand fifteen. I wish I could say that walking away made it easier. I grabbed the kids, got back to Saint Louis as quickly as possible, packed up and sold the house. Liquidated our assets and took off to Europe. We ended up in Greece. It is peaceful. Almost too peaceful. My mind continues to wonder. I think about Darien and my father. But mostly I think of Rachel. Today is seven months. God a year ago she was alive and we were all blissfully ignorant of the virus devastating the world._

 _December seventh two thousand fifteen. One year ago today I was aboard the Vyerni. I had instructed the James to continue their mission, to not hand over Rachel. Instead what do they do, find Tex and I by handing over Rachel. When Tex and I were brought to the Captain's ready room and I saw Rachel, I was pissed. I was pissed at Mike for allowing her to come. I was pissed at her for agreeing to it. She had a look of absolute relief on her face. She rushed to me, for what I thought would be a hug but instead was a kiss. A very passionate kiss. Tex was absolutely livid with me when we were taken back to our cell. Reminded me that I'm married (as if I could have forgetten that). Even when I showed him the note, he was mad, said she could have kissed him. I always assumed she kissed me because of Tex's very obvious crush on her and he may not interpret the kiss the way she needed it to be interpreted. Now as I replay it over in my mind, I don't care why she kissed me. What I would give to feel her lips on mine again._

 _February twenty fourth two thousand sixteen. Rachel has been dead for a year. Three hundred and sixty five days since I've seen her beautiful face in something other than my memories or a picture. The last year has been so hard. I can't show my grief in front of my children. I need to be strong for them. Ashley and Sam caught me staring at Rachel's picture today, silent tears running down my face. They settled in next to me. Ashley told me it was okay to cry. That she cried all the time for Darien. They both admitted to crying when they heard about Rachel. My children are growing into amazing young adults. Ashley told me it is okay to cry for Rachel as she knew how much I loved her. When I questioned her, it was Sam who said "please dad, it was so obvious you had fallen in love with her." Sam told me he had figured it out purely by all the video chats we had done while gone. He could see my face light up when I spoke about Rachel, even when I was mad at something she had done. Ashley also admitted to "eavesdropping" in on conversation I had with grandpa about Rachel. Things I had said to my father, confirmed it for her. Ashley admitted that at first she was mad because she didn't want anyone replacing Darien, but she realized that Darien wouldn't want me to be alone, she would want me to fall in love again and be happy. They both began crying as they confessed they thought of Rachel all the time too. Ashley wondered how our lives would be if Rachel was still in them. Would she and I be married? Would we have had more children? (To which Sam said "that would have been kind of cool to have another little brother or sister". Ashley also agreed that she would have liked that). I wish I had realized earlier how much Rachel's death had affected my children._

 _August ninth two thousand sixteen. Today would have been Rachel's fortieth birthday. The kids and I decided to celebrate her life. We went to the beach and I told them of how Rachel and I met and how I first realized I was in love with her. We then released butterflies at sunset. How I wish she was here with us._

 _February fifteenth two thousand seventeen. I tried to bury my head in the sand being in Greece. I tried to ignore the devastation that the red rust has done to the crops. I tried to focus on keeping my kids fed. I continue to try to deal with the loss of Rachel. Instead everything came to a head. I got caught up in...well...a fight club. I was trying to find out information. It's who I am. Low and behold I ended up fighting Mike. I was able to convey what information I've received, but he was shocked to see me. Turned out the James was here to find some seeds, seeds that I learned were here in Vellak's house. I seduced Lucia to find out where the seeds were. I know I also did it because she reminded me of Rachel. She had the same hair, same skin coloring, same petite frame. While having sex with her, I could pretend she was Rachel. I ended up back on the James. It became like second nature to be back on the ship. But as I resigned my commission, even Mike couldn't take my suggestions seriously. In the end, I reaffirmed my oath. I was given back my commission of Captain. I left Ashley and Sam with the couple Nickolas and Talia we had been renting a house from. Once this nightmare is over, I'll collect the kids and we'll go back to the United States._

 _February twenty fourth two thousand seventeen. Two years today. I was able to keep my emotions in check as we are dealing with Vellak. I ended up on the deck, staring out into the ocean this evening. Mike found me out there. He asked how I was doing. When I told him I was good, he told me to cut the bullshit. He knew that today is the two year anniversary of Rachel's death. When I admitted that I am in love with Rachel, Mike's response was classic Mike, "no fucking kidding". He told me it was more than obvious the depth of my feelings for Rachel, as were her feelings for me but we were both stubborn as hell. Mike said he couldn't imagine how hard the last two years have been on me. First losing Darien, but then falling in love with Rachel only to lose her as well. Then to lose my father. He confessed while he was angry, at the time, of me walking away, he understood why I couldn't deal anymore. He left me in peace. I just miss her so much. They say time heals all wounds, I wish I knew why this wound won't heal? I was married to Darien for almost fifteen years. I only knew Rachel for eight months. I remember bringing this up to my father once. He told me it was probably due to the fact that with Darien, I could resign myself to the possibility of her not surviving. With Rachel, it was unexpected, something I couldn't remotely prepare myself for. Will the guilt ever go away? Will the pain ever go away? I should have gone after her. I should have said something. I should have done more than tell her to "find me". I should have told her I loved her. I should have taken her in my arms. Damn me for being so fucking stubborn._

 _May twenty fourth two thousand seventeen. Rachel has been dead for twenty seven months and the United States just had a cyber attack. We don't know who is behind it yet. We've lost all internet and normal communications with the ships. While technology on the individual ships wasn't affected, we won't be able to communicate with normal methods. Overall the United States has no radar capabilities._

 _June third two thousand seventeen. I'll be leaving on a mission within the hour. The drone has found a refugee hospital about a mile inland. Refugee hospital. Something I can imagine Rachel doing. Being a doctor was her life._

* * *

Tears were streaming down Rachel's face. Hearing Tom's pain. God, they had both been so stupid. So stubborn. So ignorant.

Rachel knew she couldn't go to CIC. She had no reason to be down there. Not that that stopped her before, but things were different now. She couldn't sit here, waiting. She needed to see him. Rachel jumped up and ran out of the room. She began walking down the familiar p-ways making her way to the bridge. As she approached, she cautiously pulled the door open and walked on.

She was sure news would spread quickly about her "being alive" but she wasn't sure how quickly and how people would react. She bit her lip before clearing her throat.

The crew turned and looked at her. Alicia, Gator and Jeter had looks of pure surprise on their faces.

"Oh my god, it's true." Alicia said, jumping up from the chair and rushing over to Rachel and embracing her.

When Alicia released her, she was immediately pulled into an embrace by Jeter. "This was always god's plan...to bring you back to us now."

Rachel pulled away and smiled. "Thank you."

"I'm so sorry that you had to be lied too." Rachel told them.

"Doctor Scott" Gator spoke up "We don't know what happened and while I can only speak for myself when I say I don't care, I don't. All I care is that you're alive."

Alicia, Jeter and the other crew members nodded in agreement.

"Thank you"

"You obviously came up here for a reason.." Jeter started.

"I'm looking for Tom. He was called to CIC but that was almost an hour ago. I..I...really need to talk to him...see him."

Alicia nodded and grabbed the phone and called down to CIC.

"TAO Burk is Admiral Chandler still down there?"

Silence ensued while Burk responded to Alicia's question.

"Will he be much longer?...Thanks."

Alicia hung up the phone. "Master Chief will you escort Doctor Scott down to CIC."

Rachel put up her hands in protest, "If he is busy…"

"It isn't something that can't be taken care of by Commander Green and Admiral Slattery." Master Chief interrupted and guided Rachel off the bridge.

* * *

"How have you been doing Doctor Scott?" Jeter asked as they made their way down the p-ways to CIC.

Rachel shrugged her shoulders, "I have my good days and I have my bad days."

Jeter abruptly stopped and turned to Rachel, "If you need to talk, I'm here. I hope you know that."

Rachel smiled, "Thank you. That means a lot."

They continued the remaining of the way in silence. Jeter opened the door to CIC, Rachel followed behind.

"Master Chief." Kara said surprised to see him down there "Is there something you need?"

"Commander Granderson asked for me to escort Doctor Scott down here to speak to Admiral Chandler." Jeter replied indicating to Rachel who was standing behind him.

At the mention of her name, every head in CIC turned to her. Many mouths dropped but they immediately recovered and went back to work.

"Rachel are you okay?" Tom asked worried.

Rachel took a step towards Tom and saw the map on the table "Where are we going to take all the refugees? The other doctors and nurses?"

"We were thinking of Caracas, but we aren't sure that is the safest location right now." Kara answered. "Right now we are headed to international waters until we can figure out where we should go."

"I thought the president fortified the capital and was taking refugees. We sent people there." Rachel said.

"He did and they are, but we have received reports that El Norte is closing in. We want to make sure the refugees will be safe if we leave them there." Kara responded.

Rachel nodded. Tom came went to her and took her hand, "Commander, I'm going to excuse myself."

"Of course." Kara said.

* * *

Tom lead Rachel out of CIC and back up to his quarters. He opened the door and allowed her to enter first.

Once inside, he didn't hesitate before pulling her towards him and meeting her lips in a passionate kiss, to which Rachel eagerly responded.

They broke apart when breathing became a necessity, "Tom...we should…" Rachel tried to say as he peppered kisses down her neck.

"We'll talk later." Tom responded picking her up and carrying her to his bed. His primal urges wanted, no needed, to be sheathed in her body but he squashed them and took his time removing her clothing. He kissed every inch of her body, wanting to memorize every curve, every spot that made her gasp in pleasure.

"You're far too overdressed." Rachel mumbled in disapproval. She began to unbutton his uniform, but she struggled with the buttons. Tom took pity on her and completed the task, laying his top on the dresser. He quickly removed his boots and pants and rejoined her on the bed.

"Still too overdressed." she said reaching down and pulling his t-shirt over his head. Tom leaned down and kissed her. She pushed his boxers down as far as she could reach, before he finished the job, throwing them on the floor.

Tom broke the kiss, pushed himself up slightly so he could look into her eyes.

"I love you Rachel."

She smiled and placed her hands on his face, "I love you too"

Tom pushed her legs up and slowly entered her. Both sighed in pleasure. He began thrusting in and out of her body. Starting slowly, but picking up pace with Rachel's moans.

He looked down and saw that her eyes were filled with tears and stilled his movements.

"Baby don't cry" he whispered.

She reached up and pulled him down to her for an intense kiss.

"I just...I love you so much." she whispered back

"I love you too." Tom said and began thrusting again.

He knew he wouldn't last much longer, he reached between their bodies and began rubbing, wanting to bring her to climax with him. He could feel her walls start clenching up and she screamed in ecstasy. Tom followed seconds later grunting as he came, filling her with his essence.

They laid there, conjoined for a few moments to allow themselves to come down from their high. Tom pulled out and they both groaned at the loss of contact. He rolled off of her onto his side, pulling Rachel into him, spooning. He reached under them and pulled the sheet down and up over them.

With his arms firmly around her, Rachel began to run her hands up and down them. They laid there for a long time, content in just being in each other's arms before Rachel spoke up.

"I missed you so much Tom"

"I missed you too Rachel."

She turned in his arms so they were chest to chest, face to face.

"I tried to find you."

Tom reached up and put his hand on her cheek, "I know honey. I'm so sorry I disappeared."

Rachel reached her hand up and took his in hers.

"Thank you for keeping your journal. Thank you for letting me read it." Tom told her.

"I always knew I would find you. Somehow. Someway. I wanted you to know everything. Everything that had happened to me. Everything I was...feeling." Rachel admitted.

"Tom?"

"Hmm"

"Why did you keep those recordings, the ones about me?"

Tom took a deep breath before speaking, "like your journal was your therapeutic outlet, those recordings were mine. I just couldn't get rid of them. I'm sure at some point I would have, but not yet."

"Thank you for letting me listen to them."

Tom leaned down and gave her a gentle kiss.

"I should have told you I loved you that night Rachel. Hell, I should have told you before that."

"I should have said something too...I was just...scared." Rachel responded "What happens now?"

"Well as Kara said we are headed to international waters..." Tom answered slyly to which Rachel smacked his chest.

"That is not what I meant."

Tom laughed, "oh you mean with us."

Rachel rolled her eyes, laughing, "yes, with us."

"Oh, that's what you were talking about."

"What do you want Tom?"

He didn't hesitate before answering, "I don't want to be away from you any longer. I want to you to be my wife. I want you to be Ashley and Sam's stepmother. I want us to try to have a child of our own. I want us to grow old together...What do you want Rachel?"

Rachel smiled at him, "I want you. I want everything you just said. I want to marry you. I want to form a relationship with Ashley and Sam. I want to be pregnant with our child. I want to be by your side for the rest of our lives."

"Well it's good that we are in agreement there." Tom said.

"Yes, it is." Rachel responded.

Tom pulled her to him and kissed her passionately. "So...how about we start working on our baby."

* * *

Author's Notes: two years of pent up sexual frustration has been released! LOL.

This is NOT the end of the story. The chapter was getting a bit too long, so I removed the stuff after the above scene to another chapter. I kind of hate that I ended this chapter so similar to Come for You, but that was the conclusion of the story while this is just the conclusion of the chapter.


	4. Chapter 4

Ships in the Night chapter 4

Disclaimer: Yup don't own anything

Author's Notes: Thank you to everyone who has reviewed or favorited this story. I really appreciate it. This is the end of the story. It's kind of a short chapter, but it wraps things up rather nicely. I do hope you enjoy.

* * *

 _I'll never stop trying_

 _I'll never stop watching as you leave_

 _I'll never stop losing my breath_

 _Every time I see you looking back at me_

 _I'll never stop holding your hand_

 _I'll never stop opening your door_

 _I'll never stop choosing you babe_

 _I'll never get used to you_

-Never Stop (Wedding Version) by SafetySuit

* * *

The next couple of weeks passed quickly for Tom, Rachel and the crew of the Nathan James.

Tom was ready to have Master Chief marry them the next day, but Rachel had to calmly remind him that she wasn't going anywhere, that she was here with him and not a figment of his imagination. She wanted them to get back to Norfolk and have Ashley and Sam be present.

The refugees, doctors and nurses were dropped off in Caracas after reports showed that it was safe. Rachel had a sit down with her colleagues explaining why she wouldn't be going with them. While they were sad that she wouldn't be joining them, they understood her decision to remain with Tom on the James.

Kara and Rachel had their sit down and she told Kara everything that had happened to her the last two years, down to admitting her love for Tom and trying to find him. During one of their conversations, Kara introduced Rachel to Sasha. Sasha had been hesitant to seek Rachel out due to her and Tom's previous relationship. Kara had a feeling the two women would just click, and she was right. She observed a beautiful friendship form between the two women. Rachel, for the first time in her life, opened up to the women in ways she had never opened up to other women before. She admitted to Kara and Sasha that she didn't have many friends growing up and then as adult become focused on her work. She didn't have "time" for friends. Kara, Sasha and Rachel became the three muskateers, much to Tom and Danny's amusement. Mike would stand back and watch as the three would go head to head with Tom, especially Sasha and Rachel (more so Rachel).

During the intervening weeks, the crew of the James was able to intercept more intel on El Norte. With the help of the crew of the Michener, they were able to stop El Norte and dismantle any further cyber threats to the United States. After almost a month away from home, they were heading back to Norfolk. Thankfully, it would only take them a couple of days to get home at full speed.

Rachel was excited and nervous about heading back to the United States. As communication was still shotty, Tom was unable to communicate with Ashley and Sam. They both knew that it was going to be a huge shock to them to see her walking off the ship with their father. The James was able to communicate, via morse code, when they would be back in Norfolk. This gave the Navy a few days to get the news to the families so they could be waiting when the ship docked.

The day the got back to Norfolk, was one of the most nerve-wracking for Rachel. Tom kept reassuring her that the kids would be okay, that they had missed her and they would be thrilled to see her again.

Tom of course was right.

Ashley and Sam noticed their father first and smiled. When they saw Tom grab Rachel's hand and pull her with him, their happiness went to shock and then absolute exuberance. The kids ran over and embraced Rachel and their father, tears streaming down their faces. The next few hours were spent telling the kids everything that had happened. Rachel told them that she had kept a journal and if they wanted to read it, they could.

When they told them the news of their engagement, the kids excitement couldn't be contained.

Five days after they got back to Norfolk, Tom and Rachel were married in a small ceremony held in the backyard of their house. Rachel asked Ashley to stand with her as her maid of honor. Tom had Sam serve as his best man. Tom and Rachel asked Jeter to perform the ceremony, to which he said he would be honored.

Tom took a month of leave to spend time with his new wife and the kids. After he returned to work in mid-August, Rachel spent the rest of the time with kids, helping them get ready for the upcoming school year. She knew she would return work, most likely the CDC, after the kids returned to school, but right now she was enjoying spending time, bonding, with Ashley and Sam.

Rachel continued to spend time with Kara and Sasha. She also began spending time with Christine, who she knew a little about from her previous time on the James. As the months went by, Rachel began to treasure the friendships she had formed with the three women.

* * *

On Christmas Eve, Rachel found herself nervous again. She was about to hand out her gifts to everyone. It had taken her some time to find the right present for everyone. They finished their meal and everyone went to the living room to chat.

Rachel stood up and went over to the Christmas tree, where she had placed the presents.

"I have something for everyone." She told the group "The only thing is I want you guys to wait until I've handed out all the presents and open them together. Deal?"

The group exchanged curious glances and nodded.

Rachel handed bags to Ashley, Sam, Tom, Danny, Kara, Mike, Christine and Sasha.

Once each person had their respective bag and she had sat down again next to Tom, she spoke "okay go ahead and open them."

Each person tore into the bag and pulled out their gifts. The reactions were immediate.

Rachel smiled as each person turned their gifts around for everyone else to see.

Danny and Mike held up onesie's that had Navy on it along with "My uncle is my Hero"

Sasha's said "My aunt is my bestie!"

Christine's said "I get my awesomeness from my aunt!"

Sam's said "Big brother. Finally!"

Ashley's said "Big sister. Again."

Tom's said "Hi Daddy, Mommy told me that you are awesome, and that you are an amazing father. I can't wait to meet you."

"Oh my god!"

"Are you kidding?"

"No way!"

"Holy shit!"

"This is so exciting!"

"Really?"

"Yes!"

"This is awesome!"

Rachel nodded, tears in her eyes. "I'm pregnant."

Rachel was immediately embraced by Tom, Ashley and Sam who were all crying tears of happiness. When the foursome broke apart, hugs were shared with all their friends. As the group began to break apart and speak about the news, Tom pulled Rachel into his arms.

"I love you." Tom said

"I love you too."

Tom leaned down and gave her a gentle kiss.

He placed his hand on her still flat abdomen, "this is the best Christmas present."

"I'm glad"

"Question though." Tom said causing Rachel to give him a quizzical look "how are you possibly going to top it next Christmas?"


End file.
